Finding Grace in Motherhood

Finding Grace in Motherhood

The hardest hood we will ever walk in. Motherhood.

Why you ask? Simple. None of us know what the hell we are doing. Motherhood comes with no handbook, no play by play for each personality you bring into this world, no direction pamphlet explaining do this or don’t do this. Just opinions. Everyonnnnnnneeeesssss Opinions. Yuck right?! Some are great. Some are horrible.

I am a firm believer we are given this amazing talent the second we become pregnant called a mothers intuition. With a clear head and loving heart we can feel that deep down wrenching gut feeling that sometimes we want to run far away from or not face, but dang it is always right and will never steer us in the wrong direction.

Being a mother of three very different strong willed little ones I have learned a patience and humbleness I never imagined possible.

Here’s how. Falling straight on my face again and again. Trying to be someone I wasn’t when I first became a mama, being picture perfect but falling apart inside. I then tried the whole guilt parenting thing for a while….that worked well (Insert major eye roll here.) Being strict and over bearing because their little and I’m big. Being passive with a ton of cuddles. Ladies I am telling you what I think I have covered all the basis’s of being every “type” or “label” of parent out there. Now ready for the real game changer…were talking the big aha moment.

I didn’t HAVE to be anyone other than myself. My best self.  

There is a time to be a listening ear. A time to be understanding. A time to lose your shit. A time to go cry in the bathroom. A time to put your military hat on. A time to sit and hug them. A time to giggle and be silly.

That’s what’s so beautiful in parenting. There is a time and place for everything. It’s not right or wrong we’re just LEARNING. We are all taking this mama hood one step at a time. So let’s not judge or push our advice. Let’s just love another mom for exactly where they are at in the stage of growth the universe has put them on. Everyones learning manual and step by step guide is different.

Grace is something so important to allow ourselves in motherhood. I feel so often especially in todays controlled content world aka social media, we put expectations on ourselves of perfection. Let me be the first to tell you…Throw that idea out the window. Perfect is boring and does not exist.

So how as mothers do we bring our self grace, forgiveness, and love to show up as our best self for our families?

  1. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Pick your battles. The silly fights over toothpaste or wedgies……These we will look back and laugh.
  2. Remind yourself you are human and it is okay to make mistakes. One of my favorite quotes from Maya Angelou is “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.”
  3. God does not make mistakes. He gave you your exact children for a reason. Quit simply….You need them and they need you. Its a match made in heaven. (Literally.)
  4. Do not compare yourself to anyone else. Your journey is beautiful. No one is perfect. Not their looks, not their house, not their life. NO ONE.
  5. Give yourself the same grace and love that you would offer another mom in the same position you are in.
  6. Set an example for your children on self love. You absolutely have to have your cup at least half way FULL in order to pour into everyones cup.
  7. Do not feel guilty for chasing your goals while parenting. Just because you gave birth does not mean….”welp now I have to do nothing for the next 18 years.” Show your children how to chase passion, or hobby, or career. (What ever your thang is then girl do you!)
  8. Remember this in the rough moments…Your children do not want perfect. They want PRESENT you. Stay in the moment, no matter what the situation.
  9. Cry, Laugh, Growl….FEEL. In my experience shoving things down only end in the Armageddon.
  10. Celebrate the small victories. Always eat the cake.
  11. Do not torture yourself or feel guilty for taking time for yourself. Again, we are human and need to allow ourself that long stroll through target, massage, or walk by ourselves to re center every once in a while.
  12. The biggest thing I have learned in grace and my passionate pursuit in it lately as a mother is Forgiveness. Forgiveness: The action or process of forgiving. In the Bible the word also means to remit, to allow an action, to leave something or someone alone, to send away or to desert.

Woah chills right? In this moment, allow yourself grace. Maybe tonight reach out to a friend and tell them how awesome sauce they are. –

This week I have some EXCITING things in store for you all. Our new blogging schedule is Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7 p.m. Stay tuned for some amazing mompreneur education, momlife advice, and home diy ideas. Heres to new beginnings….and grace lots and lots of grace.

How to increase your milk supply FAST.

How to increase your milk supply FAST.

As a nursing mama it can be frusterating when your body decides to protest providing the goods for your little growing peanut! Don’t fret though, you are not alone and there are tricks to get you motivated – we are spilling all the beans today!

Every child is different and every nursing experience is completely unique in its own way. I personally never wanted to admit with baby number three that there may be an issue with my supply, but soon came to the realization a preemie baby is a completely different ball game and I needed to research sources to get more milk and fast. I wanted to share what has worked and what has completely not in the production of more milk. The scale will be 1 – 10 (one meaning not a thing changed and ten meaning a complete game changer.)

Pumping – 811-breast-pump.w1200.h630

Pump every 1-2 hours for atleast 15 minutes per breast. Once the last drop of milk comes out in the bottle, pump for an additional 2-3 minutes after to let your body know it needs to keep it coming! Pumping has definitely been a saving grace for me on this journey, especially having a preemie who is required to supplement 12 oz a day with Neo Sure. (Ya all this is ALOT of supplementing and the pump and I have become besties.) I am almost positive it is the only reason I have not dried up through our NICU stay and post partem adventures.

Fenugreek – 6

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First off…What is Fenugreek? It is a ground seed which is super high in fibers! You can take it in a capsule form, tea, make cookies, or order a pre made cocktail which already contains fenugreek. I chose to just take the capsules as all of my research said that they are the strongest and fastest way to increase milk supply! I take two in the morning, afternoon and night (a total of 6 capsules per day.) Make sure you are drinking a ton of water as well mixed with this much fiber!

Mothers Milk Tea – 4

I have only been doing one cup a night so maybe if I upped it I would see more of an increase but I can only consume so many liquids per day! If I drink it and then pump an hour later there is really not much of a difference.

Beer – 7 

Mama’s told me drink a beer or two at night and you will see a difference. I laughed and thought they were crazy and how oxymoron is this? I then got desperate and tried it. My first night I leaked over night on my sheets which is huge for not having a drop on my typical sleep. The next night I was able to pump a full 4 oz. in less then 2 hours. THIS WAS HUGE! Being a why woman, I always need facts as to why something works. Here’s the skinny ladies. Polysaccharide is in the Barley used to make beer, polysacccharide is also a stimulate to prolactin which helps mamas make more milk. There is a ton of mixed research on this.

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Drinking at least 64 oz. of Water a day – 10 

Okay,this sounds like a lot, however it’s so little if you think about the amount of liquid leaving your body. It’s absolutely crucial to be hydrated for healthy breast feeding habits. When your not thirsty drink water, you should be running to the ladies room every 30 minutes to one hour if your hydrating correctly.

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Oatmeal -5

We all know oatmeal is a wonderful source of iron. Heres the deal….Some women do not realize they are lacking iron and if this is the case with your particular situation it will effect your milk supply. The best recipe I have found so far with effectiveness is this…

  • 1/3 cup old fashion oats.
  • 1 tbs flaxseed.
  • 1 tbs brewers yeast.
  • 1 tbs brown sugar.
  • 1 cup milk. (I go with almond)
  • 1/4 cup craisins.

Rest – 4

Rest is so important for our bodies. With a new born (and especially if you have other littles) you may be rolling your eyes at me right now with a big fat “yeah right”. Just like anything in your body though,  for it to work and run properly you need proper nutrition and sleep, hands down. If babies napping, no matter how long your to do list is… take a 20 minute snooze…

co-sleeping-baby-mom-infant-sleeping

Seven has always been my favorite number…(I know, kind of basic over here. ) I put together a list of seven foods to search out and include in your every day meals. These honestly make a huge difference in nutrition for your baby and for your milk supply. 

  • Barley – In beer. You can also use in stews and soups.
  • Barley Malt – Use with chocolate or cocoa.
  • Fennel & Fenugreek – Amazing with salads or chicken.
  • Any whole grain – Think breads, pancakes, etc. Any where you can read a label and swap the white for the grain do it!
  • Brewers Yeast – If you bake throw it in some delicious cookies.
  • Vegis – Dill, Apricots, Papayas, Asparagus, Garlic, Red beets, Sesame Seeds, Caraway Seeds, Anise Seeds, Coiander Seeds.
  • Oats – Use with fruit, muffins, granola.

Most importantly, remember this is a journey… Every child is unique and different so why should your body behave any differently? Remember to give your self grace and know that you are a mama bear doing your best to give your baby everything you can. Hopefully you can take one or two things from this article and it helps!

Happy Milking Mama’s!